Breaking News:
  • OASIS Converted To DESERT
  • Performative Fall Grad Walking In Spring To Feel Included
  • Tech Bro Tooth Fairy Puts Crypto Under Kids’ Pillows
  • McCarthy Residents Encouraged to Report Socialist Peers to Administration
  • Squirrels Now Begging to Hit Your Vape Too

The Sack of Troy

USC's Second Best Parody Newspaper

The Sack of Troy

  • College
  • Local
  • World
  • Sports
  • Politics
  • Entertainment
  • Videos
  • Columns
    • Attention Vortex
    • Dear Mom
    • Girlboss Alert!
    • Reviews
    • Strong Feelings
  • About
    • History
    • Join Us
    • Contact Us
    • Members

Local

Local 

Baby Jesus Sees Shadow, Won’t Be Crucified for Another Four Months

December 25, 2018July 23, 2020 Keith Herrmann

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Keith Herrmann BETHLEHEM– For the third year in a row, the newborn Jesus Christ has seen his shadow and

Read more
Local 

Man Didn’t Realize He Was Offering Sweatshirt as Collateral in Event of Break-Up

December 10, 2018December 10, 2018 Joey Rayburn

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Joey Rayburn LOS ANGELES, CA – It’s going to be a chilly winter for one local man whose recent

Read more
Local 

Friend’s Kid Fat

December 3, 2018 Christine Politte

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Christine Politte LOS ANGELES, CA — Multiple sources close to the family have confirmed that Thomas Henderson’s son, 10-year-old

Read more
Local 

Son “Positive” His Divorced Dad Getting More Action Than Him

November 28, 2018November 28, 2018 Seth Woodhouse

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Seth Woodhouse On Saturday night, college student and notoriously shakey man Tom Davis confirmed his long held suspicions —

Read more
Local 

Friendly Reminder Actually Kind of Bitchy

November 26, 2018 Amanda Douglas

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Amanda Douglas LOS ANGELES, CA – Last week, tenants of Glendale Apartments received an email from their landlord Eli

Read more
Local 

Daddy Long Legs Likes It When You Call Him That

November 6, 2018November 6, 2018 Elise Vondra

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Elise Vondra CHICAGO, IL – Local Pholcidae George Williams likes the common name of his species, Daddy Longlegs. He

Read more
Local 

Local Man Disappointed He Gave Away Good Edibles to Lightweight Trick or Treaters

October 31, 2018July 23, 2020 Finn Kobler

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Finn Kobler FLAGSTAFF, AZ – Outrage percolated around 23-year-old Gabriel Boulton this Halloween after he received multiple complaints from

Read more
Local 

Dentist Saving Best Toothbrushes For Self on Halloween

October 30, 2018June 17, 2020 Drew Thomas-Nathan

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]By Drew Thomas-Nathan SAN DIEGO, CA — Dr. Ted Denison, a 44-year-old local dentist with patients from ages 4 to

Read more
Local 

Report: Mom Not Going to Ask You Again

October 17, 2018 Christine Politte

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Christine Politte It’s been two hours since Mom asked you to take out the trash, and you haven’t moved

Read more
Local World 

Bible Fan’s Favorite Part is the Cousin Sex

October 11, 2018January 21, 2021 Drew Thomas-Nathan

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Drew Thomas-Nathan JONESBOROUGH, TN — An explosive revelation arrived straight out of Saint Peter’s Church as 14-year-old Jacob Barrow

Read more
  • ← Previous
  • Next →

Categories

  • Apologies to The Editor
  • Attention Vortex
  • College
  • Columns
  • Comics
  • Dear Mom
  • Editorial
  • Entertainment
  • Film Bro Friday
  • Girlboss Alert!
  • Local
  • News in Brief
  • News in Pictures
  • Politics
  • Reviews
  • Sports
  • Strong Feelings
  • U.S.
  • Uncategorized
  • USC
  • Videos
  • World

Recent Posts

  • OASIS Converted To DESERT
  • Performative Fall Grad Walking In Spring To Feel Included
  • Tech Bro Tooth Fairy Puts Crypto Under Kids’ Pillows
  • McCarthy Residents Encouraged to Report Socialist Peers to Administration
  • Squirrels Now Begging to Hit Your Vape Too

Article Roulette

Billy Joel’s Bar Mitzvah Solidifies His Transition from Piano Boy to Piano Man

December 8, 2017 Joey Rayburn No Comment

Archives

© 2026 The Sack of Troy. All wrongs reserved.