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Editorial

Editorial 

Opinion: I’m One Internship Interview From Giving Up and Moving to a Cabin in the Woods

February 24, 2025February 27, 2025 Quinn Healey

By Quinn Healey LOS ANGELES, CA – Another day, another company that has yet to get back to me after

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Editorial 

OPINION: Would

December 10, 2024December 13, 2024 Liam Stephenson

By Liam Stephenson

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Editorial 

Opinion: Why I, A Straight White Cisgender Male, Will Be Watching This Season Of Dancing With The Stars With A Keen Eye

November 22, 2024December 2, 2024 Levi Elias

By Levi Elias LOS ANGELES, CA — Because I like it. It’s pretty good.

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Editorial Politics 

OPINION: Start The Steal

November 6, 2024November 6, 2024 Violet Rose Wang

By Violet Wang Washington, D.C. – Listen up liberals, the jig is up. We need to start the steal. I

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Editorial News in Brief 

I Pretended To Look Confused At The Timothee Chalamet Lookalike Competition Because #needthat

October 29, 2024October 31, 2024 Noelle Medina

By Noelle Medina NEW YORK, NY – As a woman desperately searching for a scrawny dog boy who looks like

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College Editorial USC 

OPINION: USC Campus Security Asking More Questions Than Ever About My Bloody Garbage Bag Collection

September 30, 2024October 8, 2024 Phineas Kelly

By Phineas Kelly LOS ANGELES – As USC students and faculty grow frustrated with the additional security at all campus

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Editorial Politics 

OPINION: Old Or Not, Biden Sure Knows How to Hold a Phone When Taking a Group Photo

May 31, 2024June 16, 2024 Phineas Kelly

By Phineas Kelly LOS ANGELES, CA – In light of President Joseph Robinette Biden’s recent age-related blunders, it’s important to

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Editorial 

Adorable or Dangerous? This Straight Man Knows More About Taylor Swift Than You Do

October 4, 2023September 26, 2023 Aidan Driscoll

by Aidan Driscoll LOS ANGELES, CA – Confounding women everywhere, local man Benjamin Scroggy has shown he in fact knows

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Editorial 

Opinion: A Man Hasn’t Played Guitar For Me Yet. Am I the Problem?

September 25, 2023September 25, 2023 Lily McLaughlin

By Lily McLaughlin I love Hozier, but you know what would make Hozier even better? If one of his songs

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Editorial 

Opinion: This Gold Calf Is Fucking Awesome, Should Be Our New God

September 7, 2023September 8, 2023 Bill Rockas

By Bill Rockas PORTLAND, OR – Veal fever has hit America as more and more citizens are correctly adopting a

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Recent Posts

  • Sperm Racing Rematch to Take Place in My Bedroom
  • Move Over “Severance”! Apple TV Premieres New Hit Show “Get Out with White People”
  • Spending Cuts Force LA Times “Festival of Books” to Rebrand as “Festival of Book”
  • Trump Actually Anti-Capitalist King
  • USC Names Bully Who Stole Your Lunch Money as New Head of Student Dining

Article Roulette

RSG Holds Intervention For Over-Muscular Mascot’s Steroid Habit, “Save Tommy Trojan Night”

November 22, 2013 Staff No Comment

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