Sunday, May 22, 2022
Breaking News:
  • Student Finally Watches Hentai Without Subtitles After Four Years of Japanese
  • Girl Who “Really Found Herself” Freshman Year Gets Tattoo To Prove It
  • Student Turns McCarthy Dorm Into a BDSM Dungeon Using Command Strips
  • Dear Mom: Let’s Not Watch Lady Bird Together
  • Inspiring! NYC Flasher Pivots Into Comedy Career

The Sack of Troy

USC's Second Best Parody Newspaper

The Sack of Troy

  • College
  • Local
  • World
  • Sports
  • Politics
  • Entertainment
  • Videos
  • Columns
    • Attention Vortex
    • Dear Mom
    • Girlboss Alert!
    • Reviews
    • Strong Feelings
  • About
    • History
    • Join Us
    • Contact Us
    • Members

Columns

Dear Mom Local 

Dear Mom: Let’s Not Watch Lady Bird Together

May 8, 2022May 8, 2022 Izzy Ster 141 Views

By Izzy Ster LOS ANGELES, CA — Things went south this Mother’s Day for local girl Emily Moore when she,

Read more
Girlboss Alert! Local 

Girlboss Alert! Local Woman Uses Neck Massager as Neck Massager

June 15, 2021June 15, 2021 Alexandra Ornes 942 Views

By Alexandra Ornes LOS ANGELES, CA – In a total #girlboss moment last Tuesday, Annie Bridger used her neck massager

Read more
Girlboss Alert! Local 

Girlboss Alert! This Southern Florida Gas Station Just Had a “Glow Up”

June 2, 2021June 2, 2021 Emily Torp 1160 Views

By Emily Torp CAPE CORAL, FL – This girl (gas station) is on fire! Literally! A Southern Florida Shell Gas

Read more
Entertainment Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! Melinda Takes Half of Bill’s Shit

May 20, 2021June 24, 2021 Luca Soltero 834 Views

By Luca Soltero LOS ANGELES, CA – Melinda Gates has divorced Bill Gates. This Gatekeeping #qween was not playing any

Read more
Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! The Mars Helicopter “Ingenuity” Is Definitely a Woman

April 15, 2021April 14, 2021 Emily Torp 733 Views

By Emily Torp HOUSTON, TX – Helicopter Ingenuity, or “Ginny,” as her operators in Houston call her, successfully landed on

Read more
Apologies to The Editor Columns 

Apologies to the Editor: I’m Not Really Sorry But My Mom Said I Had to Apologize

March 30, 2021March 29, 2021 Rachel Michelman 1071 Views

By Rachel Michelman Dear Editor, Listen, punk. Let’s get things straight. You’re a freaking nerd who doesn’t know your place

Read more
Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girl Boss Alert! Another Ship Gets Stuck in the Suez Canal But It Drew A Vagina This Time

March 29, 2021March 29, 2021 Sarah Cortina 1114 Views

SUEZ CANAL, EGYPT – Seamen have reported yet another hold up in the Suez Canal this morning, but this time,

Read more
Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! Cute Design of Tampon Applicator Makes Periods TOTALLY Worth It

March 18, 2021March 18, 2021 Alexandra Ornes 1233 Views

By Alexandra Ornes LOS ANGELES, CA – In a total bad bitch moment, Always has come out with a new

Read more
Columns Strong Feelings 

Opinion: I Miss Trump’s Twitter More Than My Ex

March 16, 2021March 16, 2021 Alexandra Ornes 721 Views

By Alexandra Ornes After the obligatory mourning period, I think I’m finally ready to share my feelings with the world.

Read more
Columns Strong Feelings 

Op-Ed: The Gods Are Displeased

March 9, 2021March 8, 2021 Hannah Ryan 841 Views

By Hannah Ryan Hark! The Gods are displeased and ‘tis time to talk about it.  Everyone is running ‘round willy-nilly

Read more
  • ← Previous

Social Media

  • View TheSackOfTroy’s profile on Facebook
  • View SackofTroy’s profile on Twitter
  • View sackoftroy’s profile on Instagram
  • View UC5iz3D-HpwVuhbQo-MaoJRA’s profile on YouTube

Categories

  • Apologies to The Editor
  • Attention Vortex
  • College
  • Columns
  • Comics
  • Dear Mom
  • Editorial
  • Entertainment
  • Film Bro Friday
  • Girlboss Alert!
  • Local
  • News in Brief
  • News in Pictures
  • Politics
  • Reviews
  • Sports
  • Strong Feelings
  • Uncategorized
  • USC
  • Videos
  • World

Recent Posts

  • Student Finally Watches Hentai Without Subtitles After Four Years of Japanese
  • Girl Who “Really Found Herself” Freshman Year Gets Tattoo To Prove It
  • Student Turns McCarthy Dorm Into a BDSM Dungeon Using Command Strips
  • Dear Mom: Let’s Not Watch Lady Bird Together
  • Inspiring! NYC Flasher Pivots Into Comedy Career

Archives

Staff Stuff

  • Log in
  • Entries RSS
  • Comments RSS
  • WordPress.org

Popular Posts

  • Tucker Carlson Removes Helmet of Hair to Reveal LEGO Head
    Tucker Carlson Removes Helmet of Hair to Reveal LEGO Head
  • These Horoscopes Are So Accurate it's Scary!
    These Horoscopes Are So Accurate it's Scary!
  • Judas Totally Drops the Ball and Calls It “The Last Supper” to Jesus’s Face
    Judas Totally Drops the Ball and Calls It “The Last Supper” to Jesus’s Face
  • Girl With Glasses Even Uglier Without Them
    Girl With Glasses Even Uglier Without Them

Crime Scene

Who did this? Stay tuned to find out!
Copyright © 2022 The Sack of Troy. All wrongs reserved.