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Columns

Girlboss Alert! 

“Not To Be Mean,” Girl Prefaces Before Saying The Most Insidiously Hateful Thing You’ve Ever Heard

October 20, 2023October 12, 2023 Megan Dang

By Megan Dang LOS ANGELES, CA — Local college senior Paulina Mayer wants everyone to know that she’s totally not

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Dear Mom Local 

Dear Mom: Let’s Not Watch Lady Bird Together

May 8, 2022May 8, 2022 Izzy Ster

By Izzy Ster LOS ANGELES, CA — Things went south this Mother’s Day for local girl Emily Moore when she,

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Girlboss Alert! Local 

Girlboss Alert! Local Woman Uses Neck Massager as Neck Massager

June 15, 2021June 15, 2021 Alexandra Ornes

By Alexandra Ornes LOS ANGELES, CA – In a total #girlboss moment last Tuesday, Annie Bridger used her neck massager

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Girlboss Alert! Local 

Girlboss Alert! This Southern Florida Gas Station Just Had a “Glow Up”

June 2, 2021June 2, 2021 Emily Torp

By Emily Torp CAPE CORAL, FL – This girl (gas station) is on fire! Literally! A Southern Florida Shell Gas

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Entertainment Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! Melinda Takes Half of Bill’s Shit

May 20, 2021June 24, 2021 Luca Soltero

By Luca Soltero LOS ANGELES, CA – Melinda Gates has divorced Bill Gates. This Gatekeeping #qween was not playing any

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Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! The Mars Helicopter “Ingenuity” Is Definitely a Woman

April 15, 2021April 14, 2021 Emily Torp

By Emily Torp HOUSTON, TX – Helicopter Ingenuity, or “Ginny,” as her operators in Houston call her, successfully landed on

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Apologies to The Editor Columns 

Apologies to the Editor: I’m Not Really Sorry But My Mom Said I Had to Apologize

March 30, 2021March 29, 2021 Rachel Michelman

By Rachel Michelman Dear Editor, Listen, punk. Let’s get things straight. You’re a freaking nerd who doesn’t know your place

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Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girl Boss Alert! Another Ship Gets Stuck in the Suez Canal But It Drew A Vagina This Time

March 29, 2021March 29, 2021 Sarah Cortina

SUEZ CANAL, EGYPT – Seamen have reported yet another hold up in the Suez Canal this morning, but this time,

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Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! Cute Design of Tampon Applicator Makes Periods TOTALLY Worth It

March 18, 2021March 18, 2021 Alexandra Ornes

By Alexandra Ornes LOS ANGELES, CA – In a total bad bitch moment, Always has come out with a new

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Columns Strong Feelings 

Opinion: I Miss Trump’s Twitter More Than My Ex

March 16, 2021March 16, 2021 Alexandra Ornes

By Alexandra Ornes After the obligatory mourning period, I think I’m finally ready to share my feelings with the world.

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Recent Posts

  • Sperm Racing Rematch to Take Place in My Bedroom
  • Move Over “Severance”! Apple TV Premieres New Hit Show “Get Out with White People”
  • Spending Cuts Force LA Times “Festival of Books” to Rebrand as “Festival of Book”
  • Trump Actually Anti-Capitalist King
  • USC Names Bully Who Stole Your Lunch Money as New Head of Student Dining

Article Roulette

Cheer Heard After Leaving Party Was About You

Cheer Heard After Leaving Party Was About You

November 10, 2023 Phineas Kelly No Comment

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