Local
Mother Decides to Abort 288-Month-Old Child Who Lives In Basement
By Alexandra Ornes SPRINGFIELD, IL – Margie Walker has reportedly decided to abort her 288-month-old child who currently lives in
Politics
Trump Horrified to Learn Last Four Years Spent in Presidential Simulator Were Real
By Thomas Johnston WASHINGTON, D.C.— President Trump received a cruel wake-up call today when he finally discovered that the last
College
In Sick Prank, USC Students Exposes UCLA Student to COVID… Guys, I Meant Sick As In Bad. What’re You- No! Stop High-Fiving Matt!
By Alexandra Ornes LOS ANGELES, CA – In a sick prank, a group of USC students exposed 25 UCLA students
World
Measles, Polio Assure Sobbing COVID-19 That a Vaccine Doesn’t Mean Extinction
By Drew Thomas-Nathan WESTWOOD, CA — A vaccine for COVID-19 is finally here and just starting to be distributed. Sensing
Sports
Bills Make History By Not Losing
By Mia Young BUFFALO, NY —Quarterback Josh Allen led the Buffalo Bills to a historic finish this afternoon against the
