Wednesday, January 22, 2020
Breaking News:
  • All the Memories From Before Mom Died That Are Now Available On Disney+
  • Coolest Sixth Grader Ever Throws Ball Far
  • Trendy New Fusion Restaurant Combines Mediterranean Food With Money Laundering Scheme
  • Huge Skateboard No Match For Tiny Rock
  • Good Cousins Not at Thanksgiving This Year

The Sack of Troy

USC's Second Best Parody Newspaper

The Sack of Troy

  • Local
  • World
  • Politics
  • Sports
  • News in Brief
  • Videos
  • Columns
    • Attention Vortex
    • Strong Feelings
    • Dear Mom
    • Reviews
  • About
    • History
    • Members
    • Join Us!
All the Memories From Before Mom Died That Are Now Available On Disney+
World 

All the Memories From Before Mom Died That Are Now Available On Disney+

December 5, 2019 Drew Thomas-Nathan 0
Coolest Sixth Grader Ever Throws Ball Far
Local Sports 

Coolest Sixth Grader Ever Throws Ball Far

December 4, 2019 Jonathan Krone 0
Trendy New Fusion Restaurant Combines Mediterranean Food With Money Laundering Scheme
Local 

Trendy New Fusion Restaurant Combines Mediterranean Food With Money Laundering Scheme

December 3, 2019 Staff 0
Huge Skateboard No Match For Tiny Rock
Local Sports 

Huge Skateboard No Match For Tiny Rock

December 2, 2019 Seth Woodhouse 0
All the Memories From Before Mom Died That Are Now Available On Disney+
World 

All the Memories From Before Mom Died That Are Now Available On Disney+

December 5, 2019 Drew Thomas-Nathan 0
Coolest Sixth Grader Ever Throws Ball Far
Local Sports 

Coolest Sixth Grader Ever Throws Ball Far

December 4, 2019 Jonathan Krone 0
Trendy New Fusion Restaurant Combines Mediterranean Food With Money Laundering Scheme
Local 

Trendy New Fusion Restaurant Combines Mediterranean Food With Money Laundering Scheme

December 3, 2019 Staff 0
Huge Skateboard No Match For Tiny Rock
Local Sports 

Huge Skateboard No Match For Tiny Rock

December 2, 2019 Seth Woodhouse 0

Local

Coolest Sixth Grader Ever Throws Ball Far
Local Sports 

Coolest Sixth Grader Ever Throws Ball Far

December 4, 2019 Jonathan Krone 0
By Jonathan Krone JEFFERSON MIDDLE SCHOOL — Local sixth grader Jeffrey Sanderson cemented his status as the undisputed king of
Trendy New Fusion Restaurant Combines Mediterranean Food With Money Laundering Scheme
Local 

Trendy New Fusion Restaurant Combines Mediterranean Food With Money Laundering Scheme

December 3, 2019 Staff 0
Huge Skateboard No Match For Tiny Rock
Local Sports 

Huge Skateboard No Match For Tiny Rock

December 2, 2019 Seth Woodhouse 0
Good Cousins Not at Thanksgiving This Year
Local 

Good Cousins Not at Thanksgiving This Year

November 28, 2019 Staff 0
Visibly Erect Tommy Trojan Asks to Be Covered in Duct Tape All Year
Local News in Brief Sports 

Visibly Erect Tommy Trojan Asks to Be Covered in Duct Tape All Year

November 26, 2019 Drew Thomas-Nathan 0

News in Brief

Visibly Erect Tommy Trojan Asks to Be Covered in Duct Tape All Year
Local News in Brief Sports 

Visibly Erect Tommy Trojan Asks to Be Covered in Duct Tape All Year

November 26, 2019 Drew Thomas-Nathan 0
Last Minute DIY Skeleton Costume!
News in Brief 

Last Minute DIY Skeleton Costume!

November 1, 2019 Melanie Hoffmann 0
Homeless Man With Funny Sign Still Homeless
News in Brief 

Homeless Man With Funny Sign Still Homeless

February 11, 2019 Susi Basse 0
Every Day “Turkey Day” For Bowling Larry
News in Brief 

Every Day “Turkey Day” For Bowling Larry

November 22, 2018 Sam Kushell 0

Politics

Sweetness of “Local USC Moms and Dads” Facebook Group Sullied by Custody Fight in Comments Section
Local Politics 

Sweetness of “Local USC Moms and Dads” Facebook Group Sullied by Custody Fight in Comments Section

November 25, 2019 Dan Toomey 0
by Dan Toomey LOS ANGELES, CA — What began as a sparkle of hope amid a semester of despondency was
OPINION: Why’d We Have to Learn Sex Ed If We’d Never Have to Use That Stuff in the Real World?
Columns Politics Strong Feelings 

OPINION: Why’d We Have to Learn Sex Ed If We’d Never Have to Use That Stuff in the Real World?

November 8, 2019 Staff 0
Tall Guy Could Be Taller
Local Politics 

Tall Guy Could Be Taller

November 7, 2019 Staff 0
ISIS Down to Original Drummer
Politics World 

ISIS Down to Original Drummer

October 29, 2019 Staff 0

World

All the Memories From Before Mom Died That Are Now Available On Disney+
World 

All the Memories From Before Mom Died That Are Now Available On Disney+

December 5, 2019 Drew Thomas-Nathan 0
By Drew Thomas-Nathan ANAHEIM, CA — The streaming wars are heating up, and your entertainment overlords over at the Walt
Heartwarming: Nick and Joe Always Let Kevin Press the Button in the Elevator
World 

Heartwarming: Nick and Joe Always Let Kevin Press the Button in the Elevator

November 5, 2019 Staff 0
ISIS Down to Original Drummer
Politics World 

ISIS Down to Original Drummer

October 29, 2019 Staff 0
Youngest Child Kind of a Dud
World 

Youngest Child Kind of a Dud

October 28, 2019 Amanda Douglas 0

Sports

Coolest Sixth Grader Ever Throws Ball Far
Local Sports 

Coolest Sixth Grader Ever Throws Ball Far

December 4, 2019 Jonathan Krone 0
By Jonathan Krone JEFFERSON MIDDLE SCHOOL — Local sixth grader Jeffrey Sanderson cemented his status as the undisputed king of
Huge Skateboard No Match For Tiny Rock
Local Sports 

Huge Skateboard No Match For Tiny Rock

December 2, 2019 Seth Woodhouse 0
Visibly Erect Tommy Trojan Asks to Be Covered in Duct Tape All Year
Local News in Brief Sports 

Visibly Erect Tommy Trojan Asks to Be Covered in Duct Tape All Year

November 26, 2019 Drew Thomas-Nathan 0
Roommate Really Glad You Think the Skeleton is a Decoration
Local Sports 

Roommate Really Glad You Think the Skeleton is a Decoration

October 30, 2019 Jose Cardenas 0

Videos

The Sack Totally Roasts UCLA!
Videos 

The Sack Totally Roasts UCLA!

November 17, 2017 Staff 0
Summer 2017 in Review
Videos 

Summer 2017 in Review

August 21, 2017 Hannah Ceselski 0
In Memoriam: Locked Up, Dismantled Bikes
Videos 

In Memoriam: Locked Up, Dismantled Bikes

May 5, 2017 Jack Hackett 0
Spring Break 2017 In Review
Videos 

Spring Break 2017 In Review

March 20, 2017 Staff 0
Wow! This Tour Guide Said “F**k It” and Decided to Give an Honest Tour of Campus
Videos 

Wow! This Tour Guide Said “F**k It” and Decided to Give an Honest Tour of Campus

January 13, 2017 Matt Hanisch 0

Columns

OPINION: Why’d We Have to Learn Sex Ed If We’d Never Have to Use That Stuff in the Real World?
Columns Politics Strong Feelings 

OPINION: Why’d We Have to Learn Sex Ed If We’d Never Have to Use That Stuff in the Real World?

Opinion: Fun Fact Could Have Been Funner
Columns Strong Feelings 

Opinion: Fun Fact Could Have Been Funner

I Slept With Every Cast Member of the Classic 80s Sitcom “Lotta Family” Only to Find Out it Never Existed. Here’s What I Learned.
Attention Vortex Columns 

I Slept With Every Cast Member of the Classic 80s Sitcom “Lotta Family” Only to Find Out it Never Existed. Here’s What I Learned.

Guess What? Dad’s Gonna Live, So Quit Calling Dibs on the Antiques!
Columns Strong Feelings 

Guess What? Dad’s Gonna Live, So Quit Calling Dibs on the Antiques!

Op-Ed: Is Hecuba Likable Enough?
Columns Strong Feelings 

Op-Ed: Is Hecuba Likable Enough?

Well, Mom’s Drunk Again, Which Means We Can Wear Her Scarves
Columns Strong Feelings 

Well, Mom’s Drunk Again, Which Means We Can Wear Her Scarves

Quiz: Is He Into You or Does He Want to Kill You and Your Siblings To Get His Hands on the Baudelaire Fortune?
Attention Vortex Columns 

Quiz: Is He Into You or Does He Want to Kill You and Your Siblings To Get His Hands on the Baudelaire Fortune?

Stop Complaining, People! Marvel’s Probably Going to Retcon Stan Lee’s Death in a Couple of Months
Columns Strong Feelings 

Stop Complaining, People! Marvel’s Probably Going to Retcon Stan Lee’s Death in a Couple of Months

Cool! This Bathroom Has a Fold Down Table so I Can Eat My Lunch Without Being Bullied!
Columns Strong Feelings 

Cool! This Bathroom Has a Fold Down Table so I Can Eat My Lunch Without Being Bullied!

Op-Ed: I Bet I Could Kick Neil Armstrong’s Ass Now That He’s Dead
Columns Strong Feelings 

Op-Ed: I Bet I Could Kick Neil Armstrong’s Ass Now That He’s Dead

Tweets for Twerps

My Tweets

Categories

  • Attention Vortex
  • Columns
  • Comics
  • Dear Mom
  • Editorial
  • Local
  • News in Brief
  • Politics
  • Reviews
  • Sports
  • Strong Feelings
  • TWRN
  • Uncategorized
  • Videos
  • World

Recent Posts

  • All the Memories From Before Mom Died That Are Now Available On Disney+
  • Coolest Sixth Grader Ever Throws Ball Far
  • Trendy New Fusion Restaurant Combines Mediterranean Food With Money Laundering Scheme
  • Huge Skateboard No Match For Tiny Rock
  • Good Cousins Not at Thanksgiving This Year

Archives

Staff Stuff

  • Log in
  • Entries RSS
  • Comments RSS
  • WordPress.org

Newsletter

Popular Posts

  • Poor Family Uses Bread Instead of Hot Dog Buns
    Poor Family Uses Bread Instead of Hot Dog Buns
  • USC Students Inconvenienced, Thrilled by SAG Awards
    USC Students Inconvenienced, Thrilled by SAG Awards
  • Homeless Man With Funny Sign Still Homeless
    Homeless Man With Funny Sign Still Homeless
  • McCarthy RA DNA Test Reveals 50% Bloodhound
    McCarthy RA DNA Test Reveals 50% Bloodhound

Crime Scene

Who did this? Stay tuned to find out!
Copyright © 2020 The Sack of Troy. All rights reserved.