Breaking News:
  • Cocaine Bear Spotted with Emily Ratajkowski
  • Opinion: If Starbucks Doesn’t Start Putting the Vanilla in My Vanilla Soy Latte I’m Going to Start Union Busting
  • Ratatouille Sequel? This Movie is About a Guinea Pig Who Writes Funny Letterboxd Reviews Under This Guy’s A24 Hat
  • Colorblind Dumbass Pinched to Death On St Patrick’s Day
  • The Sack of Troy Oscar’s Predictions

The Sack of Troy

USC's Second Best Parody Newspaper

The Sack of Troy

  • College
  • Local
  • World
  • Sports
  • Politics
  • Entertainment
  • Videos
  • Columns
    • Attention Vortex
    • Dear Mom
    • Girlboss Alert!
    • Reviews
    • Strong Feelings
  • About
    • History
    • Join Us
    • Contact Us
    • Members

Girlboss Alert!

Girlboss Alert! Local 

Girlboss Alert! Local Woman Uses Neck Massager as Neck Massager

June 15, 2021June 15, 2021 Alexandra Ornes 1418 Views

By Alexandra Ornes LOS ANGELES, CA – In a total #girlboss moment last Tuesday, Annie Bridger used her neck massager

Read more
Girlboss Alert! Local 

Girlboss Alert! This Southern Florida Gas Station Just Had a “Glow Up”

June 2, 2021June 2, 2021 Emily Torp 1726 Views

By Emily Torp CAPE CORAL, FL – This girl (gas station) is on fire! Literally! A Southern Florida Shell Gas

Read more
Entertainment Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! Melinda Takes Half of Bill’s Shit

May 20, 2021June 24, 2021 Luca Soltero 1271 Views

By Luca Soltero LOS ANGELES, CA – Melinda Gates has divorced Bill Gates. This Gatekeeping #qween was not playing any

Read more
Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! The Mars Helicopter “Ingenuity” Is Definitely a Woman

April 15, 2021April 14, 2021 Emily Torp 1154 Views

By Emily Torp HOUSTON, TX – Helicopter Ingenuity, or “Ginny,” as her operators in Houston call her, successfully landed on

Read more
Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girl Boss Alert! Another Ship Gets Stuck in the Suez Canal But It Drew A Vagina This Time

March 29, 2021March 29, 2021 Sarah Cortina 1498 Views

SUEZ CANAL, EGYPT – Seamen have reported yet another hold up in the Suez Canal this morning, but this time,

Read more
Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! Cute Design of Tampon Applicator Makes Periods TOTALLY Worth It

March 18, 2021March 18, 2021 Alexandra Ornes 1582 Views

By Alexandra Ornes LOS ANGELES, CA – In a total bad bitch moment, Always has come out with a new

Read more
Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! Meghan Markle Calls the Queen A Bitch In New Oprah Interview

March 8, 2021March 8, 2021 Emily Torp 1890 Views

By Emily Torp LONDON, UK – Meghan has officially reclaimed her voice! This #qween is the first black woman to

Read more
Columns Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! This Mother and Daughter Both Tested Positive for COVID-19!

March 1, 2021March 1, 2021 Sarah Cortina 892 Views

By Sarah Cortina LOS ANGELES, CA – In this pandemic, it’s been difficult to stay connected while distanced, but this

Read more
Girlboss Alert! News in Pictures Politics 

Republicans Celebrate Spooky Season By Making Americans Fear For the Future of Their Civil Rights

October 26, 2020June 9, 2021 Drew Thomas-Nathan 1188 Views

By Drew Thomas-Nathan

Read more
Girlboss Alert! 

Girlboss Alert! My Exotic Queen Wants Me to Stop Calling Her That

October 9, 2020October 10, 2020 Johnny "Beef Boi" Romani 976 Views

By Johnny “Beef Boi” Romani This is your resident New Jersey beef boy Johnny Romani reporting (straight outta Decaying White

Read more
  • ← Previous

Recent Posts

  • Cocaine Bear Spotted with Emily Ratajkowski
  • Opinion: If Starbucks Doesn’t Start Putting the Vanilla in My Vanilla Soy Latte I’m Going to Start Union Busting
  • Ratatouille Sequel? This Movie is About a Guinea Pig Who Writes Funny Letterboxd Reviews Under This Guy’s A24 Hat
  • Colorblind Dumbass Pinched to Death On St Patrick’s Day
  • The Sack of Troy Oscar’s Predictions

Article Roulette

Friend’s Kid Fat

Friend’s Kid Fat

December 3, 2018 Christine Politte No Comment

Archives

© 2023 The Sack of Troy. All wrongs reserved.