Student Finally Watches Hentai Without Subtitles After Four Years of Japanese
By Lili Adkins LOS ANGELES, CA –– USC senior Simon Griffin reports that after eight laborious semesters of intensive Japanese
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Local
Girl Who “Really Found Herself” Freshman Year Gets Tattoo To Prove It
By Alexandra Ornes LOS ANGELES, CA – Maya Blair, a freshman who “really found herself” this year, finally got the
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Student Turns McCarthy Dorm Into a BDSM Dungeon Using Command Strips
By Lili Adkins LOS ANGELES, CA –– While conducting a mandatory Health and Safety Inspection in McCarthy Residential College, USC
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Dear Mom: Let’s Not Watch Lady Bird Together
By Izzy Ster LOS ANGELES, CA — Things went south this Mother’s Day for local girl Emily Moore when she,
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Film Major Minors in Book
By Joshua Wolk LOS ANGELES, CA — Last Tuesday, film major Elizabeth Wright declared a minor in book. “They say
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Dehydrated Sorority Girl At Coachella Just Like When Jesus Went 40 Days Without Water
By Sarah Cortina INDIO, CA — To culminate the most religious experience of the year for those who(se parents) can
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New FAFSA Form Simply Asks Question “Do You Ski”
By Sarah Cortina VAIL, COLORADO — Multiple college seniors were denied collegiate financial aid after answering ‘yes’ on the 2022-2023
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Head & Shoulders to Release New 3-in-1: Shampoo, Conditioner, Antidepressant
By Rachel Michelman CINCINNATI, OH — At Head & Shoulders headquarters, Chief Head and Director (CHAD) Pete Davids and ambassador
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Skateboarder Eats Shit, Contracts E Coli
By Jackson Irvine HOLLYWOOD, CA — Yesterday evening medical professionals were called to the home of 22-year-old, self-described home boy
Read more5 Signs You Might Be Driving Into Oncoming Traffic
By Joshua Wolk 1. WRONG WAY Red, white, and plastered against a blue sky. So patriotic! If you see this
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