Insufferable Douche Worth Being Friends With Because He’ll Be Rich Later
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Chai Karve MARSHALL SCHOOL OF BUSINESS — Local douche Elliot Tufts greeted his friends in the lobby of Fertitta
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Washing Roommates’ Dishes Prepares Woman for Future as Unappreciated Housewife
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Christine Politte TROY HALL — When sophomore Jackie Wallace gets home each evening, a stack of her roommates’ dirty
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Uncle on Ancestry.com on Brink of Discovering Huge Cover-up in Family History
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers While filling in his family tree late Thursday night, local uncle Dan Polinski came dangerously close to
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Local Man Awfully Smug No One Has Any Allegations Against Him
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Eloise Rollins-Fife LOS ANGELES– In the wake of recent allegations of sexual misconduct by high-profile men, local man Jason
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90% of Weeks Declared “Rough” by Monday Afternoon
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Christine Politte As the semester begins, increasing numbers of students are struggling to get through the week. In the
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War on Christmas Continues After Local Woman Wished “Happy Honda Days”
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Joey Rayburn ALBUQUERQUE, NEW MEXICO — Uh-oh, everybody. It’s time to batten down the hatches, call your spouse, and
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College Freshman Still in Summer Lifeguard Mode
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Elise Vondra PARDEE TOWER – Freshman Jeremy Gladen wakes up every morning with a purpose- to ensure the safety
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Woman Looks at Solidified Jar of Coconut Oil, Feels First Chill of Winter
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kylie Harrington CULVER CITY, CA — Amelia Jones’ mid-December trip to the beach was tragically cut short early this
Read moreBilly Joel’s Bar Mitzvah Solidifies His Transition from Piano Boy to Piano Man
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Joey Rayburn LONG ISLAND, NEW YORK — He might not have started the fire, but Billy Joel is finally
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Parents Who Say “Do Whatever Makes You Happy” Rich Enough to Mean It
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Chai Karve REDONDO BEACH, CA — Lindsay Stauffer’s parents, known to many as Mr. and Mrs. Stauffer, are always
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