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Author: Kim Rogers

Local 

Woman Sips Vodka-Sodas Like She Won’t Be Vag Deep in Cheesy Gordita Crunch Within Hour

April 4, 2018 Kim Rogers

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers Perched on a barstool at the Baker Street Pub, area dieter Katherine Fink took dainty sips from

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Local 

Business Presentation Using More Prop Work Than Called For

February 12, 2018 Kim Rogers

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers LOS ANGELES– Local advertising agency executives left their all-staff meeting shocked on Wednesday, after witnessing a funding

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Local 

Uncle on Ancestry.com on Brink of Discovering Huge Cover-up in Family History

January 10, 2018 Kim Rogers

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers While filling in his family tree late Thursday night, local uncle Dan Polinski came dangerously close to

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Local 

Whole Branch of Family Rolls Up With One Side Dish

November 24, 2017 Kim Rogers

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers After hours of toiling over the stove and resetting the oven timer, local martyr Delilah Owens was

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Entertainment Local 

Area Captain Jack Sparrow Needs Help With His Makeup

October 30, 2017June 19, 2020 Kim Rogers

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers LOS ANGELES– Local Captain Jack Sparrow and area Lucille Ball readied their home Saturday in anticipation of

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Local 

Relationship Reaches Milestone as Woman Forgets Own Creative Ambitions

October 23, 2017October 23, 2017 Kim Rogers

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers After one year of exclusive dating, Chelsea Sawyer and her boyfriend Marshall Brooks took their relationship to

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Local 

Weakest Link Very Enthusiastic About Physical Education Course

September 27, 2017 Kim Rogers

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers USC — Monday morning, local “weak link” Garrett Carter got up extra early to stretch for his

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Local 

Area Woman Can’t Hear Date Over Ticking of Biological Clock

September 6, 2017 Kim Rogers

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers LOS ANGELES, CA– No matter how close she leaned in, area woman Martha Pratt couldn’t make out

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Local 

Bottom of Ice Cream Pint Only One With Balls to Tell Desperate Woman “Enough is Enough”

August 24, 2017August 24, 2017 Kim Rogers

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers LOS ANGELES, CA — After getting laid off in January, desperate woman Marcia Bell cracked open a

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College Local 

Graduating Senior Finds Cute, Cheap Pad in Parent’s Basement

May 2, 2017June 17, 2020 Kim Rogers

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Kim Rogers LOS ANGELES, CA — After landing an enviable entry-level position as a hostess at her local Macaroni

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Recent Posts

  • Sperm Racing Rematch to Take Place in My Bedroom
  • Move Over “Severance”! Apple TV Premieres New Hit Show “Get Out with White People”
  • Spending Cuts Force LA Times “Festival of Books” to Rebrand as “Festival of Book”
  • Trump Actually Anti-Capitalist King
  • USC Names Bully Who Stole Your Lunch Money as New Head of Student Dining

Article Roulette

LA to Create Program to Divert Mental Health Calls From Stoic Dads Saying “Tough It Up”

December 3, 2020 Drew Thomas-Nathan No Comment

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