Breaking News:
  • POTUS Changes Holiday Name To “Trump-MLK Day”
  • Millie Bobby Brown Adopts Fellow Child Actors
  • Business Bro Confused By New MLM Show
  • Petroleo the Oil Wizard Seen Whispering to Trump During Press Conference 
  • USC Dutch Bros Does Not Pass Bechdel Test

The Sack of Troy

USC's Second Best Parody Newspaper

The Sack of Troy

  • College
  • Local
  • World
  • Sports
  • Politics
  • Entertainment
  • Videos
  • Columns
    • Attention Vortex
    • Dear Mom
    • Girlboss Alert!
    • Reviews
    • Strong Feelings
  • About
    • History
    • Join Us
    • Contact Us
    • Members

USC

College USC 

USC on Brink of War Between Wheel People and Foot People

October 20, 2017June 19, 2020 Veronica Marks

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Veronica Marks LOS ANGELES, CA – On first glance, McClintock Avenue seems peaceful and serene. The sun shines on

Read more
College USC 

Loser Kid Upstaged by His Father at Trojan Family Weekend

October 13, 2017June 19, 2020 Sydney Sanchez

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Sydney Sanchez USC— At the Trojan Family Weekend freshman Jacob Kowalski had planned to show his parents the impressive

Read more
College USC 

Weird Horse Girl a Little Too Into Traveler

October 4, 2017June 19, 2020 Staff

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Elise Vondra ROUND LAKE, IL. — Incoming USC freshman Sarah Nando walked through her stable one last time and

Read more
College USC 

Nikias Beats Out Another 20 Million Dollar Donation From Billionaire Alum

September 28, 2017January 23, 2021 Staff

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Joey Rayburn SAN MARINO, CA – After being shortchanged one too many times, USC president C.L. Max Nikias took

Read more
College USC 

Nikias on Tuition Hike: “It’s Nothing Personal, It’s Just Business”

September 22, 2017June 19, 2020 Chai Karve

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Chai Karve USC — University President C.L. Max Nikias shrugged his shoulders in defense and put down his thick

Read more
College USC 

USC Med Students Dissect Massive Elephant in the Room

September 7, 2017January 23, 2021 Staff

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Ethan Thomson LOS ANGELES – USC’s Keck School of Medicine is off to an exciting start as students returned

Read more
College USC 

Girl on Apartment Meal Plan Finds Trojan Plan Sugar Daddy

August 30, 2017June 19, 2020 Staff

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Elise Vondra TROJAN GROUNDS, USC – As she went to pay for her grande soy latte, sophomore Lucy White

Read more
College USC 

USG Does Free Food Thing to Raise Awareness About USG

March 22, 2017June 19, 2020 Chai Karve

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Chai Karve CAMPUS CENTER — The Undergraduate Student Government allows students to take action and enact change on campus.

Read more
College USC 

C.L. Max Nikias Spends Weekend Snorting Coke Off Toilet Seat In Gender Neutral Bathroom of Culver City Target

March 6, 2017January 23, 2021 Staff

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Nolan Jones CULVER CITY, CA — Liberated from his responsibilities running a world-class research university, USC President C.L. Max

Read more
College USC 

Sophomore on Apartment Meal Plan “Gonna Make This Swipe F*cking Count!”

March 1, 2017June 19, 2020 Matt Hanisch

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Matt Hanisch USC — Chad Bronkowski, a sophomore on the apartment meal plan, had only 8 meal swipes left

Read more
  • ← Previous
  • Next →

Categories

  • Apologies to The Editor
  • Attention Vortex
  • College
  • Columns
  • Comics
  • Dear Mom
  • Editorial
  • Entertainment
  • Film Bro Friday
  • Girlboss Alert!
  • Local
  • News in Brief
  • News in Pictures
  • Politics
  • Reviews
  • Sports
  • Strong Feelings
  • U.S.
  • Uncategorized
  • USC
  • Videos
  • World

Recent Posts

  • POTUS Changes Holiday Name To “Trump-MLK Day”
  • Millie Bobby Brown Adopts Fellow Child Actors
  • Business Bro Confused By New MLM Show
  • Petroleo the Oil Wizard Seen Whispering to Trump During Press Conference 
  • USC Dutch Bros Does Not Pass Bechdel Test

Article Roulette

Art Major Draws Nudes So He Can Be Productive AND Horny

Art Major Draws Nudes So He Can Be Productive AND Horny

February 13, 2019 Jose Cardenas No Comment

Archives

© 2026 The Sack of Troy. All wrongs reserved.