Reasons Behind the Closure of UV’s Flagship Theatre

by Robert Smat

UNIVERSITY VILLAGE –On routine strolls through USC’s University Village over the past few weeks, many students have encountered an unfortunate sight: the UV’s popular Flagship Theater had closed.

A single piece of white printer paper was seen taped to the ticket booth window with the details of the closure written in marker, a fitting end for the low-budget theater.

The theater was most likely forced to close due to the low demand for- what? What’s the matter?

What do you mean no one told you that the theater closed? I’m so sorry you had to find out this way. I had no idea.

Wow, OK. I know this must be really sudden for you and you didn’t see this coming, but the theater was old? It had it’s prime a long time ago. It’s just time for it to go. The employees are probably all in a happier place now.

Don’t cry, please don’t- ugh. No, I understand. I wanted to cry too when I first heard the news. But Jesus Christ, Jeremy! How had no one told you about this? Have you been living under a rock since you got back to campus?!

I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell. I know it was scary. I didn’t mean it. Just get out from under your desk. I’m not going to hurt you.

I’m worked up about this too, OK? It’s not like any of us really liked that place? The seats were rigid, the cushions were flat, and the movies were always discolored and the audio was terrible. But man, we had six dollar movies a quarter mile from campus! You can’t hate on a place that gives you that.

This is one of those things we all took for granted. Maybe no one will miss it besides us. It doesn’t matter. We loved that place. What better way to treat two ladies to a double date freshman year? Yeah, there’s that smile. I knew you’d come around.

It’s alright, buddy. They’re gonna clean up UV soon ya know, then we might get a real nice theater. A real nice one. Wanna hit up Dollar Dollar before they go out of business too? Ok, super, let’s go.

Appreciate what you are given. Cherish your blessings in life. Take nothing for granted.