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College

College Local USC 

UCLA to Ban “Tribute to Troy”

November 21, 2013January 21, 2021 Staff articles

by Anshu Siripurapu After banning the USC Drum Major from stabbing the turf at the Rose Bowl last year, the

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College News in Brief 

Freshman Asserts Peer Pressure Doesn’t Exist, “Now Stop Being Such A Little Bitch, Shut The Door, And Take The Damn Shot”

November 20, 2013June 17, 2020 Staff headline
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College News in Brief 

President Bush Asked To Tackle Campus Alcohol Abuse Today, “Mission Accomplished”

November 19, 2013June 17, 2020 Staff headline
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College News in Brief Politics USC 

ROTC Students Respond Nervously to George Bush’s “Fight On”

November 19, 2013June 19, 2020 Staff headline
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College Politics USC 

USC to Hire George W. Bush as New Dean of Price

November 19, 2013June 19, 2020 Staff articles

by Anshu Siripurapu Former President of the United States George W. Bush is expected to replace Jack H. Knott as

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College News in Brief Politics USC 

President Bush Visits USC Tomorrow, Declares Major In Nucular Engineering

November 18, 2013June 19, 2020 Staff headline
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College News in Brief USC 

Trojan Grounds Introduces New Menu Items With “Street” Theme: “Yo, Tro Gro Got Fro Yo, Fo Sho”

November 18, 2013June 19, 2020 Staff headline
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College Local USC 

Home Depot Invades USC

November 17, 2013January 21, 2021 Jori Barash articles

by Jori Barash Students began reporting evidence of a foreign presence as recently as Thursday night. Rob Finklestein, a freshman

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College News in Brief Sports USC 

Band Performs Sober For ESPN Game Day Rally, “Worst Playing Yet”

November 16, 2013June 19, 2020 Staff headline
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College Local USC 

Spanish Curriculum Finally Drops Unlearnable Words: “Rain… Cold… Snow… Winter”

November 15, 2013June 19, 2020 Staff
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Recent Posts

  • Flailing Alumni Account Forced to Post Derrick
  • Elon Musk Becomes First Kajillionaire
  • OASIS Converted To DESERT
  • Performative Fall Grad Walking In Spring To Feel Included
  • Tech Bro Tooth Fairy Puts Crypto Under Kids’ Pillows

Article Roulette

“See, New York Is Just Fucking Better than LA,” Coughs USC New Yorker Through Cloud of Smoke

“See, New York Is Just Fucking Better than LA,” Coughs USC New Yorker Through Cloud of Smoke

June 7, 2023 Sarah Cortina No Comment

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