- ROTC Students Respond Nervously to George Bush’s “Fight On”
- Freshman Asserts Peer Pressure Doesn’t Exist, “Now Stop Being Such A Little Bitch, Shut The Door, And Take The Damn Shot”
Breaking News:
- USC Affirms its Commitment to Being a Limited Speech Zone
- Colorblind MSU Fan Can’t Tell Who To Root For
- The Tonight Dough Prices Surge as People Confuse Jimmy Kimmel with Jimmy Fallon
- The Summer I Turned Handsome? This Man Is Having Sex With Two Sisters
- “‘The Bear’ Is Not a Comedy” Wins ‘Most Original Thought’
The Sack of Troy
USC's Second Best Parody Newspaper
