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Author: Joshua Wolk

Local 

Therapist Has Seen Way Worse Imposter Syndrome Than Yours

September 13, 2023September 12, 2023 Joshua Wolk 680 Views

By Joshua Wolk LOS ANGELES – Last Friday, your therapist had her license revoked after breaking client confidentiality to declare

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News in Brief 

From the Archives: Lil Tay Obituary

August 10, 2023September 10, 2023 Joshua Wolk 872 Views

by Joshua Wolk Rapper Lil Tay, 14, passed away from unknown causes on Tuesday, August 10, 2023, according to her

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Uncategorized 

Mitch McConnell Hit By Brain Freeze After Secret Ice Cream Date With President Biden

August 10, 2023August 10, 2023 Joshua Wolk 638 Views

WASHINGTON — Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell suddenly stopped speaking during a Republican news conference on Wednesday on account of

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News in Brief 

OceanGate Rebrands Submersible as Immersive Titanic Experience

June 24, 2023June 24, 2023 Joshua Wolk 963 Views

By Joshua Wolk Following the submersible implosion that killed five men, OceanGate employees were seen frantically writing over brochures in

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Local 

LA’s Hot New Bar Crawl Just Chabad, Hillel, Then Chabad Again

April 4, 2023April 4, 2023 Joshua Wolk 906 Views

LOS ANGELES, CA –– This Monday, Eater LA announced that the 2022 top bar crawl is just Chabad, Hillel, and

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Editorial 

Opinion: They Wouldn’t Be Small Businesses If They Worked Harder

February 27, 2023February 25, 2023 Joshua Wolk 786 Views

By Joshua Wolk While elitist Republicans and Democrats wax lyrical about serving local businesses, I reckon it’s time that we

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Sports 

Dog Tom Brady Retires After 22nd Season of Puppy Bowl

February 12, 2023February 12, 2023 Joshua Wolk 1529 Views

By Joshua Wolk GLEN FALLS, NY — Dog Tom Brady announced his retirement after his 22nd Puppy Bowl season with

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College 

Exeter Frat Boy Rates Women By Amount of AP Classes Taken

January 13, 2023January 10, 2023 Joshua Wolk 740 Views

By Joshua Wolk LOS ANGELES, CA — This past Tuesday, Phillips Exeter Academy alumni Cheston Springharvest scoffed to his fraternity

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Uncategorized 

Griffith Astronomers Find Last Star Visible in LA Just Carl’s Jr. Logo

December 29, 2022December 25, 2022 Joshua Wolk 987 Views

By Joshua Wolk LOS ANGELES — Two months after Governor Gavin Newsom vetoed legislation to reduce light pollution, Griffith Observatory

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World 

BREAKING: Ye Caught Stealing Jewish Kids’ Gifts From Under Tree All Along

December 25, 2022December 22, 2022 Joshua Wolk 987 Views

By Joshua Wolk WHOVILLE — After waking up little Cindy-Lou Whoberg, Ye was caught tip-toeing into a Jewish household and

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Recent Posts

  • Sperm Racing Rematch to Take Place in My Bedroom
  • Move Over “Severance”! Apple TV Premieres New Hit Show “Get Out with White People”
  • Spending Cuts Force LA Times “Festival of Books” to Rebrand as “Festival of Book”
  • Trump Actually Anti-Capitalist King
  • USC Names Bully Who Stole Your Lunch Money as New Head of Student Dining

Article Roulette

California Child Devastated, Only Got Kale for Halloween

November 1, 2015 Staff No Comment

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