Thursday, March 4, 2021
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Author: Jonathan Krone

Politics 

GOP Finally Addresses Climate Change With New “Virgin In A Volcano Act”

September 7, 2020January 21, 2021 Jonathan Krone 348 Views

By Jonathan Krone WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a dramatic shift in GOP rhetoric, Republican leadership has announced that they will

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Editorial Entertainment 

Cancel Culture Gone Too Far? Child Rapist Roman Polanski Hasn’t Won A Golden Globe In Over 9 Years!

August 28, 2020January 21, 2021 Jonathan Krone 278 Views

By Jonathan Krone PARIS, FRANCE – It’s hard to believe, but it’s been 9 years since Roman Polanski won a

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Politics 

45% of People Who Don’t Vote Super Psyched To Turn Out For Joe Biden

August 24, 2020August 20, 2020 Jonathan Krone 335 Views

By Jonathan Krone UNITED STATES OF AMERICA – In an enthusiasm groundswell never before seen in American politics, the 45%

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College Politics USC 

USC Board Authorizes Spending of Entire Endowment on “Miscellaneous Brick Stuff”

August 21, 2020January 23, 2021 Jonathan Krone 2064 Views

By Jonathan Krone LOS ANGELES, CA — In a move many are calling “extremely fishy,” the Board of Trustees of

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Local 

Parrot Repeats Slurs A Little Too Enthusiastically

August 18, 2020August 15, 2020 Jonathan Krone 357 Views

By Jonathan Krone RIVERWOOD, FLORIDA — Local animal lover Reggie Whiteman reported today that his parrot Polly was repeating racial

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Politics 

Democrats Close Abortion Clinics Nearby Convention to Make John Kasich Feel More At Home

August 14, 2020January 21, 2021 Jonathan Krone 344 Views

By Jonathan Krone MILWAUKEE, WI – In anticipation of the Democratic National Convention on August 17th, the DNC shut the

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Politics 

Post Office Starts Offering Bubble Wrap Popping to Make Ends Meet

August 13, 2020January 21, 2021 Jonathan Krone 636 Views

By Jonathan Krone WASHINGTON DC –  Desperate to balance their budget in the face of being defunded by the Trump

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Politics 

Kamala Harris VP Selection Shores Up Support Among Current Biden Supporters

August 11, 2020January 21, 2021 Jonathan Krone 482 Views

By Jonathan Krone  WILMINGTON, DELAWARE – Following a long Vice Presidential search committee, the selection of Senator Kamala Harris has

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Politics 

Trump Repeals Obama-Era Law of Gravity

July 30, 2020January 21, 2021 Jonathan Krone 493 Views

By Jonathan Krone WASHINGTON, D.C. – In the latest move in his war on regulation, today President Donald Trump signed

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Politics World 

New Stimulus Bill Will Send “Get Well Soon” Balloon To Every Coronavirus Patient

July 7, 2020January 21, 2021 Jonathan Krone 490 Views

By Jonathan Krone WASHINGTON D.C. – In a sweeping new stimulus bill introduced Monday, Congress announced that every single coronavirus

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Recent Posts

  • Texas Challenges Coronavirus to Good Ol’ Fashioned Western Showdown
  • USC Freshmen Receive Welcome Box Containing Four White Claws, a Fire Alarm Set For 4am, and a Lifetime of Student Debt
  • Girlboss Alert! This Mother and Daughter Both Tested Positive for COVID-19!
  • Local Idiot Wants Pink Lightsaber when OBVIOUSLY That Color Isn’t Even Canon
  • Democrats Crown Marjorie Taylor Greene As New Miss Donald Trump

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Popular Posts

  • USC Freshmen Receive Welcome Box Containing Four White Claws, a Fire Alarm Set For 4am, and a Lifetime of Student Debt
    USC Freshmen Receive Welcome Box Containing Four White Claws, a Fire Alarm Set For 4am, and a Lifetime of Student Debt
  • Tucker Carlson Removes Helmet of Hair to Reveal LEGO Head
    Tucker Carlson Removes Helmet of Hair to Reveal LEGO Head
  • Texas Challenges Coronavirus to Good Ol’ Fashioned Western Showdown
    Texas Challenges Coronavirus to Good Ol’ Fashioned Western Showdown
  • Man Laughs at Something Funny He Just Thought of, Waits for People to Ask Him What It Is
    Man Laughs at Something Funny He Just Thought of, Waits for People to Ask Him What It Is
  • Girlboss Alert! This Mother and Daughter Both Tested Positive for COVID-19!
    Girlboss Alert! This Mother and Daughter Both Tested Positive for COVID-19!

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