Underpaid Chemistry Lecturers Vote to Un-Ionize
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Axel Hellman USC — In a landmark decision, part-time lecturers, adjuncts, and other non-tenure staff at the Dornsife School
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Author: Axel Hellman
Total Nerd Actually Studies for Final
by Axel Hellman, Cameron Gavinski, and Jack Hackett USC–This morning a complete nerd sat down to begin studying for his
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Triumphant Freshman Adds Another Empty Alcohol Bottle to Windowsill
by Axel Hellman and Mark Lee NEW NORTH–Matt Kogger, a freshman drinking virtuoso, emptied the last drop of Jack Daniels
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To Cut Water Use, USC Promises to Install New Drought-Tolerant Plants Every Three Weeks
by Axel Hellman USC–As the state has dried up, USC has faced increasing criticism from environmental activists for its lush
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Lyon Center Expansion Completed
by Axel Hellman Responding to student concerns about overcrowding at the Lyon Center, the University Office of Student Affairs has
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Salmon-Shorted Bros Swim Hundreds of Miles Upstream, Spawn
by Axel Hellman During the fall and spring semesters, they congregate in their fraternity houses on the row, and hold
Read moreUSC to Sell Luxury Car, Yacht Parking on Trousdale
by Mark Lee and Axel Hellman USC–As part of the university’s $6 billion capital fundraising campaign, President Max C. L.
Read moreSenior Sorority Sister Discovers Ralph’s after Almost 4 Years of Living at USC
by Mark Lee and Axel Hellman Photoshop by Jack Hackett Senior Kenzie Bovard was walking north along Vermont Ave on
Read moreUniversity Urges American Students to Adopt Easy-to-Remember Chinese Nicknames
by Axel (Nánxìng mèilì – 男性魅力 – “attractive male”) Hellman and Jack (Guànjūn – 冠军 – “champ”) Hackett SCHOOL — USC prides
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EVKitty Stages Own Death for Insurance Money
by Axel Hellman Students last week were aghast to hear news that USC’s beloved mascot EVKitty had been run over
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