Ball So Hard? An Interview with Tom Brady
by Grace Carballo In a press conference earlier this afternoon, New England Patriots’ quarterback, Tom Brady, addressed the intense societal
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Student Surprised To Find Earth Still Spinning Following UCLA Loss
by Andy Gause Trent Molina, a mixology Senior, woke up flabbergasted to find the world had not come to a
Read moreUSC Football Still a Thing
by Rob Smat and Tyler Pullen LOS ANGELES MEMORIAL COLISEUM — “USC Football is totally still a thing,” shouted Pat
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USC Introduces New Half-Price Half-Time Football Tickets
by Grace Carballo USC–In an effort to increase student-section sales, the USC ticket office has introduced an enticing new deal:
Read moreKim Jong Un Recruited as University of Arizona’s Kicker
by Jori Barash After weeks staying out of the public eye, North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un’s whereabouts are finally
Read moreBaltimore Ravens Ban Players named “Ray”
by Rob Smat BALTIMORE, MD–Following the media storm brewing around Ray Lewis and Ray Rice, the Baltimore Ravens have announced
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USC Football Unveils $1.1 Billion Outdoor Heating System
by Tyler Pullen After the football team’s disappointing performance in Boston’s cold weather last Saturday, USC’s athletic department finally decided
Read moreTrustees Vote to Change “USC Trojans” to “USC W.A.S.P.S”
by Joseph Grazier After months of debate, controversy, and multi-million dollar donations, the USC Board of Trustees voted this Saturday
Read moreUniversity To Allow Student-Athletes To Drop ‘Student’ Duties If Specific Athletic Goals Met
by Andy Gause MCKAY CENTER – On Monday, the university announced a program to allow certain student-athletes to opt out
Read moreStudent Accidentally Attends Non-Football Sporting Event
by Andy Gause Photo by Lauren Williams Last semester, Johnny ‘Foosball’ Burgess, a freshman hippie punching major, stumbled upon a
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