Cocaine Bear Spotted with Emily Ratajkowski
By Sarah Cortina NEW YORK, NEW YORK — This past weekend, supermodel Emily Ratajkowksi was spotted with Cocaine Bear. In
Read more
Entertainment
The Sack of Troy Oscar’s Predictions
By Izzy Ster and Bill Rockas Glitz! Glamour! Whites! Sack of Troy has all the accurate predictions made for the
Read more
Equality Win! Pete Davidson Shows Men Can Sleep Their Way To The Top Too
By Sarah Cortina NEW YORK — Following confirmation of his latest fling with supermodel Emily Ratajkowski, Pete Davidson cemented his
Read more
Inspiring! NYC Flasher Pivots Into Comedy Career
By Aidan Driscoll NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK — A famed New York City flasher and public mastrubator has inspired
Read more
Elon Musk Admits How Much He Would Pay To Say A Slur
By Levi Elias “You know that feeling when the one thing you want to do is the one thing that
Read more
Brockhampton Disbands, Will Now Be Grooming Kids Separately
By Staff Brockhampton, a favorite amongst those bitches with the Fjallraven backpacks and Doc Martens, has gone on indefinite hiatus
Read more
5 Hallmark Movies That Will Make You Want to Kill Yourself This Holiday Season
By Charlotte Phillipp Nothing makes us feel more festive than a heartwarming TV movie during the holiday season, and the
Read more
Alec Baldwin Unsatisfied with Shot, Says “Let Me Try”
By Levi Elias “Alec Baldwin” by Gage Skidmore is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0
Read more
Coronavirus Tests Positive for Ed Sheeran
By Staff SUFFOLK, ENGLAND — Expressing regret that it hadn’t taken precautionary action against the singer-songwriter, the Coronavirus announced today
Read more
Netflix Announces ‘James and the Giant Peach’ Spinoff, ‘Nicki Minaj’s Cousin’s Friend and the Time His Balls Inflated Like a Goodyear Blimp and Carried Him to Brooklyn’
By Staff “When we saw Nicki Minaj’s Twitter thread, we knew it was a match made in entertainment heaven,” said
Read more