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Sports

College Sports USC 

Inspirational: Parents At USC Target On Game Day Celebrate First Day In Public

November 7, 2025January 16, 2026 Noelle Medina

By Noelle Medina LOS ANGELES, CA – They grow up so fast! To celebrate being born yesterday, Trojan parents took

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College Sports USC 

USC Admin Announces Budget Woes Will Be Solved as Soon as Six-Leg Parlay Hits This Weekend

October 6, 2025January 16, 2026 Alex Wong

By Alex Wong LOS ANGELES, CA — In a Thursday press conference, Chair of the USC Board of Trustees, Suzanne

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Entertainment Film Bro Friday Politics Sports U.S. 

Pronoun Debate Comes To a Boil as Him Gets 29% on Rotten Tomatoes

September 25, 2025January 16, 2026 Gabby Frugoni

By Gabby Frugoni LOS ANGELES, CA – The debate over gender pronouns has escalated following negative criticism of the new

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Sports USC 

Colorblind MSU Fan Can’t Tell Who To Root For

September 20, 2025January 9, 2026 Sarah Ruiz

By Sarah Ruiz LOS ANGELES, CA –  Die hard Michigan State fan Fred Greenfield, who suffers from red-green colorblindness, realized

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Entertainment Sports World 

Taylor Swift Drops First Easter Egg for 2030 Divorce Album

August 26, 2025August 26, 2025 Margaret Danenhauer

By Margaret Danenhauer NASHVILLE, TN – Taylor Swift just looked at the sales numbers for Adele’s 30 and sighed…and then

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Attention Vortex College Sports Uncategorized USC 

All Football Hopefuls Must Tryout With an Eight Bar Cut of “Single Ladies”

August 24, 2025August 26, 2025 Charlotte Phillipp

By Charlotte Deckle LOS ANGELES, CA — With football walk-on tryouts just around the corner, legions of wannabe Trojan football

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Sports 

Opinion: Why I, A 5’10” Unathletic Male, Am The Perfect Candidate To Replace Juju Watkins This Season

March 28, 2025March 29, 2025 Dean Woods

By Dean Woods LOS ANGELES, CA – The USC community and the nation as a whole witnessed a devastating moment

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Sports 

NFL Playoffs Briefly Overshadowed By Hulking Alien Monolith Blocking the Sun

February 3, 2025February 4, 2025 Phineas Kelly

By Phineas Kelly US — In a shocking and unexpected event this weekend, NFL playoff games were briefly overshadowed by

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Sports 

SC Loses After Freshman Forgets To Kick Lamppost

November 30, 2024February 4, 2025 Bill Rockas

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – As the Trojans concluded their lackluster Big 10 season with a loss to

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Sports 

Rivalry Game Actually Just A Mid-Off

November 23, 2024December 2, 2024 Izzy Ster

By Izzy Ster PASADENA, CA — Following much anticipation for the 2024 USC V. UCLA rivalry game, both teams fought

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Recent Posts

  • POTUS Changes Holiday Name To “Trump-MLK Day”
  • Millie Bobby Brown Adopts Fellow Child Actors
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  • Petroleo the Oil Wizard Seen Whispering to Trump During Press Conference 
  • USC Dutch Bros Does Not Pass Bechdel Test

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Oscar-Mayer Truck Visits Trousdale, Immature Freshman Passes Out Trying To Restrain Wiener Jokes

November 11, 2013 Staff No Comment

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