Colorblind Dumbass Pinched to Death On St Patrick’s Day

By Bill Rockas BOSTON, MA – Colorblind sixth grade teacher Dave Pendleton arrived at his classroom wearing all red and

Study Finds That Porn Creates Unrealistic Expectations For Pizza Deliveries

By Bill Rockas JACKSONVILLE, FL – Researchers at The Institute For Hookup Discovery have found that 90% of porn watchers

By Bill Rockas WASHINGTON — U.S. Secretary of Transportation, Pete Buttigieg, has instituted an expansive network of juvenile children to

By Bill Rockas INDIANAPOLIS, IN – Beloved drunkard Reuben Waine celebrated his employment as a driver by pregaming his first

By Bill Rockas CASPER, WY – Through Twitter, Truth.Social, and your step dad’s group chat, election deniers everywhere are expressing

By Bill Rockas PHOENIX, AZ – Pathetic simpleton Frank Lellen hit an existential crisis at the age of 32, leading

By Bill Rockas Ragers and kickbacks be damned. It’s time for trick-or-treating! Sack of Troy has the scoop on the

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – College freshman Earl Corlin has been introducing himself as an Alabama native with

By Bill Rockas SEATTLE, WA – Fall is here and it’s time the crematories got in on the fun! All

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – Diana Heffler, a recent widow, has exhausted multiple counseling forums, but the student