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Author: Bill Rockas

Local 

Colorblind Dumbass Pinched to Death On St Patrick’s Day

March 17, 2023March 19, 2023 Bill Rockas 61 Views

By Bill Rockas BOSTON, MA – Colorblind sixth grade teacher Dave Pendleton arrived at his classroom wearing all red and

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World 

Study Finds That Porn Creates Unrealistic Expectations For Pizza Deliveries

January 26, 2023January 24, 2023 Bill Rockas 135 Views

By Bill Rockas JACKSONVILLE, FL – Researchers at The Institute For Hookup Discovery have found that 90% of porn watchers

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Politics 

Secretary of Transportation Hires Hundreds of Children to Kick The Back of Your Fucking Seat

December 27, 2022December 25, 2022 Bill Rockas 253 Views

By Bill Rockas WASHINGTON — U.S. Secretary of Transportation, Pete Buttigieg, has instituted an expansive network of juvenile children to

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World 

Man Pre-Games Driving

December 15, 2022December 14, 2022 Bill Rockas 197 Views

By Bill Rockas INDIANAPOLIS, IN – Beloved drunkard Reuben Waine celebrated his employment as a driver by pregaming his first

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Politics 

Election Deniers Bummed That Trump’s Second Term Almost Over

November 21, 2022November 20, 2022 Bill Rockas 229 Views

By Bill Rockas CASPER, WY – Through Twitter, Truth.Social, and your step dad’s group chat, election deniers everywhere are expressing

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U.S. 

Man Working To Better Himself Looks Fucking Stupid

November 10, 2022November 9, 2022 Bill Rockas 225 Views

By Bill Rockas PHOENIX, AZ – Pathetic simpleton Frank Lellen hit an existential crisis at the age of 32, leading

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College USC 

Which Schools At USC Give Out Which Candy

October 27, 2022October 26, 2022 Bill Rockas 292 Views

By Bill Rockas Ragers and kickbacks be damned. It’s time for trick-or-treating! Sack of Troy has the scoop on the

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Local 

Guy From Alabama Doesn’t Seem Ashamed Enough

October 10, 2022October 9, 2022 Bill Rockas 237 Views

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – College freshman Earl Corlin has been introducing himself as an Alabama native with

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World 

Cremations Now Made With Pumpkin Spice

October 6, 2022October 4, 2022 Bill Rockas 313 Views

By Bill Rockas SEATTLE, WA – Fall is here and it’s time the crematories got in on the fun! All

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Local 

Philosophy Major Tells Grieving Widow What She’s Going Through

September 28, 2022September 27, 2022 Bill Rockas 322 Views

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – Diana Heffler, a recent widow, has exhausted multiple counseling forums, but the student

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Recent Posts

  • Cocaine Bear Spotted with Emily Ratajkowski
  • Opinion: If Starbucks Doesn’t Start Putting the Vanilla in My Vanilla Soy Latte I’m Going to Start Union Busting
  • Ratatouille Sequel? This Movie is About a Guinea Pig Who Writes Funny Letterboxd Reviews Under This Guy’s A24 Hat
  • Colorblind Dumbass Pinched to Death On St Patrick’s Day
  • The Sack of Troy Oscar’s Predictions

Article Roulette

Freshman Practices Humblebrag in Mirror Before Meeting Up with High School Friends

Freshman Practices Humblebrag in Mirror Before Meeting Up with High School Friends

March 10, 2017 Jori Barash No Comment

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