Progressive Man Defies Gender Roles, Waits for Girl to Ask Him Out
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Matt Hanisch LOS ANGELES, CA — Self-proclaimed progressive Louis Adams-Smith took a bold step last week when he decided to
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Politics
“People Need to Be More Open-Minded,” Asserts Woman Who Unfriended Everyone with Different Views
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Christine Politte SILVER LAKE, CA — Saddened by the country’s deep ideological divisions, local woman Marilyn Reed made a
Read moreHillary Clinton Hangs Up Spurs, Moseys Off Into Sunset
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Jack Hackett AMERICA — After failing to make it into the presidential office on Tuesday, Hillary Clinton called it
Read moreThe Sack of Troy Endorses Mikey McCormack For 8th Grade Class President
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text] The Sack of Troy strives to bring our readers objective news they can trust, no matter their political leanings.
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“This Will Go Over Great!” Says White Guy Dressed For Halloween As Smurf with ‘Blue Lives Matter’ Sign
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Quinton Buxton THE ROW — This year, Halloween promises to provide students not only with an opportunity to drown
Read moreTim Kaine Bursts Into Harmonica Solo In The Face Of Difficult Debate Questions
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Georgina Chiou LONGWOOD UNIVERSITY, VA — Democratic Vice Presidential nominee Tim Kaine has garnered a tremendous amount of attention
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Voters Relieved Debate Changed Nothing
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Staff AMERICA — The first presidential debate between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump quelled the fears of local voters
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Police Commit to Shooting More Unarmed White People to Ensure Equality
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Alan Smithee LAS VEGAS, NV — With over 136 black people killed to date by police officers in the
Read moreDakota Access Pipeline Finds Alt. Route Through Black Neighborhood
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]by Matt Hanisch LAKE OAHE, ND — After enduring several protests from members of the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe, developers
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Frat Wonders If Enough Time Has Passed To Throw 9/11 Themed Party
According to ΣΩT president Robert Meyer, the party could easily be “lit” and the Sunday evening event would “blow up” the row, puns intended, unless it’s still too soon.
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