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The Great Migration: USC Students Flock East for Coachella

April 11, 2025April 18, 2025 Sarah Ruiz

By Sarah Ruiz LOS ANGELES, CA – Pack your pills and poppers, USC’s finest scholars are heading East for the

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USC 

Term “DEI” Changes to “Community” to Reinforce USC’s Values as a Community College

March 27, 2025March 29, 2025 Levi Elias

By Levi Elias LOS ANGELES, CA – In an email sent to the USC population by the Office of the

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USC 

USC Students Agree: St. Patrick’s Day On Spring Break Is A Waste of a Good Excuse to Drink

March 17, 2025March 29, 2025 Quinn Healey

By Quinn Healey LOS ANGELES, CA/CABO SAN LUCAS, MEX – In a rare display of solidarity, the USC Interfraternity and

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College 

Girl Gets Parents to Fund Trip to Cabo by Saying She Can Get Around Tariffs

March 14, 2025March 14, 2025 Violet Rose Wang

By Violet Rose Wang LOS ANGELES, CA – Trying to get your parents to spend even more money on your

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USC 

Carol Folt Finally Locks The Fuck In For Final Semester

March 12, 2025March 14, 2025 Levi Elias

By Levi Elias LOS ANGELES, CA — Soon-to-be retired USC president Carol Folt just realized that she’s wasted her entire

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USC 

USC Announces Multi-Million, Top-of-the-Line, Revolutionary Program to Debut Right After You Graduate

February 20, 2025February 27, 2025 Violet Rose Wang

By Violet Rose Wang LOS ANGELES, CA – USC administration announced this morning that they would soon be debuting an

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USC 

USC Defunds Daily Trojan to Fund Sack of Troy

December 6, 2024December 13, 2024 Violet Rose Wang

By Violet Rose Wang LOS ANGELES, CA – In light of the Daily Trojan announcing that USC has slashed their

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College 

Scheduling A Mandatory Meeting, And 5 Other Signs That Your Academic Advisor Wants You

December 2, 2024December 2, 2024 Dean Woods

By Dean Woods LOS ANGELES, CA – As class registration for next semester rolls around once again, emails are flying

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College 

“Sassy Man” Friend Just A Really Dickish Straight Guy

November 20, 2024November 21, 2024 Megan Dang

By Megan Dang   LOS ANGELES, CA — Josh Andrews, beloved by his female friends for being a “sassy man”, is

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Local USC 

Former Stout Burger Location Converts Into Spirit Halloween

November 1, 2024October 31, 2024 Izzy Ster

By Izzy Ster LOS ANGELES, CA – It’s that time of year again! We all finally have an excuse to

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  • E-Scooter Snuck Into Doheny and Leavey
  • Taylor Swift Drops First Easter Egg for 2030 Divorce Album
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  • Carol Folt Dead

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