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Author: Bill Rockas

Politics 

Secretary of Transportation Hires Hundreds of Children to Kick The Back of Your Fucking Seat

December 27, 2022December 25, 2022 Bill Rockas

By Bill Rockas WASHINGTON — U.S. Secretary of Transportation, Pete Buttigieg, has instituted an expansive network of juvenile children to

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World 

Man Pre-Games Driving

December 15, 2022December 14, 2022 Bill Rockas

By Bill Rockas INDIANAPOLIS, IN – Beloved drunkard Reuben Waine celebrated his employment as a driver by pregaming his first

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Politics 

Election Deniers Bummed That Trump’s Second Term Almost Over

November 21, 2022November 20, 2022 Bill Rockas

By Bill Rockas CASPER, WY – Through Twitter, Truth.Social, and your step dad’s group chat, election deniers everywhere are expressing

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U.S. 

Man Working To Better Himself Looks Fucking Stupid

November 10, 2022November 9, 2022 Bill Rockas

By Bill Rockas PHOENIX, AZ – Pathetic simpleton Frank Lellen hit an existential crisis at the age of 32, leading

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College USC 

Which Schools At USC Give Out Which Candy

October 27, 2022October 26, 2022 Bill Rockas

By Bill Rockas Ragers and kickbacks be damned. It’s time for trick-or-treating! Sack of Troy has the scoop on the

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Local 

Guy From Alabama Doesn’t Seem Ashamed Enough

October 10, 2022October 9, 2022 Bill Rockas

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – College freshman Earl Corlin has been introducing himself as an Alabama native with

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World 

Cremations Now Made With Pumpkin Spice

October 6, 2022October 4, 2022 Bill Rockas

By Bill Rockas SEATTLE, WA – Fall is here and it’s time the crematories got in on the fun! All

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Local 

Philosophy Major Tells Grieving Widow What She’s Going Through

September 28, 2022September 27, 2022 Bill Rockas

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – Diana Heffler, a recent widow, has exhausted multiple counseling forums, but the student

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University Urges American Students to Adopt Easy-to-Remember Chinese Nicknames

March 30, 2015 Axel Hellman No Comment

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