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Month: September 2025

College USC 

Beong-Soo Kim Junior Named New President of USC

September 30, 2025January 16, 2026 Margaret Danenhauer

By Margaret Danenhauer LOS ANGELES, CA — Immediately after announcing that USC is now taking laws regarding legacy admissions set

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College Entertainment USC 

Dick Wolf Drama Center Renamed to Dog Penis BFA Rehab

September 27, 2025January 16, 2026 Margaret Danenhauer

By Margaret Danenhauer  LOS ANGELES, CA — Less than a year after USC’s School of Dramatic Arts named their new

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Entertainment Film Bro Friday Politics Sports U.S. 

Pronoun Debate Comes To a Boil as Him Gets 29% on Rotten Tomatoes

September 25, 2025January 16, 2026 Gabby Frugoni

By Gabby Frugoni LOS ANGELES, CA – The debate over gender pronouns has escalated following negative criticism of the new

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Politics U.S. 

CIA Injects Lab Grown Evil Lesbians into Dating Pool in Attempt to Drive Messy She/They Bisexuals to Republicanism

September 24, 2025January 16, 2026 Margaret Danenhauer

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Rapp rapp. A knuckle taps on the glass, not yearning for freedom, but for chaos – the

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Politics U.S. 

White House Announces Band-Aids The Cause of Sepsis 

September 22, 2025January 16, 2026 Sarah Ruiz

By Sarah Ruiz WASHINGTON, D.C. – This afternoon President Trump and U.S. Health and Human Services (HHS) Secretary Robert F.

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College Politics USC 

USC Affirms its Commitment to Being a Limited Speech Zone

September 21, 2025January 14, 2026 Margaret Danenhauer

By Margaret Danenhauer  LOS ANGELES — In a recent email to the student body, Interim President Beong-Soo Kim clarified USC’s

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Sports USC 

Colorblind MSU Fan Can’t Tell Who To Root For

September 20, 2025January 9, 2026 Sarah Ruiz

By Sarah Ruiz LOS ANGELES, CA –  Die hard Michigan State fan Fred Greenfield, who suffers from red-green colorblindness, realized

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Entertainment Politics U.S. 

The Tonight Dough Prices Surge as People Confuse Jimmy Kimmel with Jimmy Fallon

September 18, 2025January 8, 2026 Pablo Rodriguez

By Pablo Rodriguez LOS ANGELES, CA – The price of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream flavor The Tonight Dough has

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Entertainment 

The Summer I Turned Handsome? This Man Is Having Sex With Two Sisters

September 17, 2025January 8, 2026 Charlotte Dekle

By Charlotte Dekle COUSINS BEACH, MA — Inspired by the hit Amazon series “The Summer I Turned Pretty”, local Massachusetts

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Entertainment 

“‘The Bear’ Is Not a Comedy” Wins ‘Most Original Thought’

September 15, 2025January 8, 2026 Charlotte Dekle

By Charlotte Dekle LOS ANGELES, CA — In the opening sketch of the Emmy Awards last night, comedian Nate Bargatze

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Recent Posts

  • RFK Jr. Launches ‘Just Say No’ Anti-Vax Campaign
  • Man Who Restates What You Said But Louder Wins Pulitzer Prize
  • Traveler Refuses to Eat Hay: “Only Meat,” Says the Horse
  • Bari Weiss Guts 60 Minutes; Now 15 Seconds
  • ART COLUMN: Rorschach’s Newest Painting Looks an Awful Lot Like My Drunk Dad

Article Roulette

Fun Event Occurs at Parkside- Onlookers in Disbelief

Fun Event Occurs at Parkside- Onlookers in Disbelief

November 7, 2013 Axel Hellman No Comment

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