Trump Horrified to Learn Last Four Years Spent in Presidential Simulator Were Real
By Thomas Johnston WASHINGTON, D.C.— President Trump received a cruel wake-up call today when he finally discovered that the last
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Author: Thomas Johnston
“Researchers Find” Makes Headline Sound More Official
By Thomas Johnston
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Roommates Meet For First Time After Router Malfunction
By Thomas Johnston LOS ANGELES, CA– In an uncomfortable yet touching modern-day meet-cute, long-time roommates Julian Smith and William Li
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You Think You’ve Suffered From The Pandemic? This Guy’s Whole Personality Was Going To The Gym
By Thomas Johnston LOS ANGELES, CA – Missing your friends and family? Sick of all the uncertainty? Tired of spending
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Tesla Autopilot Swerves Elon Musk Into Oncoming Traffic In Elaborate First-Ever A.I. Kamikaze Attack
By Thomas Johnston LOS ANGELES, CA— In a horrific car non-accident that can only be explained as the first-ever A.I.
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