- Oscar-Mayer Truck Visits Trousdale, Immature Freshman Passes Out Trying To Restrain Wiener Jokes
- Football Game Versus The Irish Quickly Devolves Into Drinking Contest
Breaking News:
- Sperm Racing Rematch to Take Place in My Bedroom
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- Spending Cuts Force LA Times “Festival of Books” to Rebrand as “Festival of Book”
- Trump Actually Anti-Capitalist King
- USC Names Bully Who Stole Your Lunch Money as New Head of Student Dining
The Sack of Troy
USC's Second Best Parody Newspaper
