Mom Only Person to Talk Shit to Daughter’s Face and Compliment Behind Back

by Sydney Sanchez

LOS ANGELES, CA — After overhearing her mother on the phone, college sophomore Eloise Van realized that her mom, Brenda Van, is the only one to talk shit to her face and compliment her behind her back. Soon after Eloise’s mother chewed her out over her new belly button ring, but Eloise overheard her mother call her grandfather to rave about her role as an extra in the university play.

“I don’t understand. One minute she’s yelling and calling me a slut for wearing a two piece bathing suit and the next she’s reliving my SAT score to my aunts. Does she like me or does she hate me?” questioned Eloise.

When asked about the mother-daughter relationship, Brenda’s co-worker shared, “She’s always like, ‘Eloise this, Eloise that.’ We get it. Your daughter is special.” Brenda’s co-workers rolled their eyes and nodded in agreement.

At press time Brenda was hinting that Eloise had gained more than a couple pounds since leaving home.