Meteorologists on Date Skip Small Talk, Get Straight to the Weather

by Kylie Harrington

LOS FELIZ, CA – Abandoning the useless social niceties that send many first dates down the drain, local meteorologists Carly Ferguson and TJ Jackson ditched the small talk and got straight to the weather on Thursday evening, to positive effect.

The two weather experts clicked instantly as they shared a plate of onion rings, and Jackson attributed the success to the radical straightforwardness of their conversation.

“I hate talking about nothing, or feeling like I’m wasting my time. I don’t care about your hopes or your dreams. Tell me about that cloud cover today and how it made you feel a bit funky,” said Jackson.

Ferguson and Jackson sparred playfully on their definitions of “dry heat” and used the phrase “high pressure system” at least seven times.

“He’s just so genuine. His opinions on humidity are the same as mine,” said Ferguson, “and that true connection is such a rare thing these days.”

When the topic of political and religious beliefs came up, they both awkwardly shuffled their napkins until Ferguson noticed a cloud out of the bay window. Ferguson said “Look, cumulus!” pointing out the window and reinvigorating the date.

The lovebirds report that they are already planning a second meeting at a park next Tuesday, and that they look forward to the thrill of debating the 50 percent precipitation forecast.