- Hipster Club Accepts New 2014 Members Before They Are Cool
- Tommy Trojan Accused In Doping Scandal, Doctors Call Abs of Bronze “Unnatural”
Breaking News:
- From the Archives: Top 10 Commandments
- USC to Change Tuition Policy to “Girls Free, Guys $90,000”
- Therapist Has Seen Way Worse Imposter Syndrome Than Yours
- “Oh Wow, You Have a Tech Startup in Palo Alto? That’s Sooooo Cool” And Other Useful Phrases to Get Laid This Weekend
- Opinion: This Gold Calf Is Fucking Awesome, Should Be Our New God
The Sack of Troy
USC's Second Best Parody Newspaper
