By Sarah Cortina
LOS ANGELES, CA – A local fraternity shattered glass ceilings last night at their biggest party of the semester, leaving 14 injured.
Sigma Ligma Chi has been attempting to revamp their image as ‘the one that drugs girls.’ Later an anonymous brother stated, “Yeah we’ve been trying to show that like, we don’t do that anymore, so we’ve been ordering only cocaine instead of cocaine and ketamine.”
This positive word began spreading around, however partygoers mistook a new policy of ‘no roofies’ to mean ‘no roof’ and immediately started hurling beer cans at the ceiling to see who could break it the fastest. Oddly enough, the roof constructed by 23 pledges was not sound, as it shattered instantly.
Luckily, similar to the age of the girls attending the frat parties, most of the injuries are minor.
Photo by Jacob Bentzinger on Unsplash