Storytime: I Failed My Math Test for Being Christian

By Charlotte Dekle

LOS ANGELES, CA — This past week, I have faced more adversity than most people face in their entire lives: I was discriminated against by my woke math teacher for being Christian, just because I put Jesus as the answer to every question — Because Jesus is always the answer!

After turning in the test in Remedial Math 1, “Professor” (and godless whore lesbian) Patricia Fettiwig scanned the page and started laughing, nay, cackling, like the witch that “she” is. 

“You cannot be serious.” Fettiwig intoned.

“I am very serious about the Lord. All things are through Him.” I proclaimed boldly with conviction.

The smile faded from “her” face. I had won. “She” put away the paper and told me to go back to my seat to plan when I was not going to have sex with my boyfriend. 

The next day, I received the grade back. A zero! I was shocked by this blatant anti-Christian bias. I went up to she/it after class and asked why I had received this pagan grade. 

“You didn’t answer a single question. When asked to simplify this fraction, you wrote ‘2 Corinthians 11:3 purity and simplicity in devotion to Christ’. When asked to show your work, you just wrote ‘Him.’” The heatheness gawked.

After the meeting, I was devastated. I was so distraught that all I could do was reach out to Turning Point USA to help them get my professor fired. God really does give his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers.