Robert Durst Tries Stand-Up, Kills
by Alex Greenblatt COMEDY CELLAR — At a local open mic, real estate mogul, heir to the Seymore Durst, and Read more
News in Brief
Poor Family Uses Bread Instead of Hot Dog Buns
by Hannah Ceselski SPRINGFIELD, MO -- Every Sunday night, matriarch Susan Hobbes treats her family to a special meal of Read more
Bored Man Shaves Hair Around Nipples to Look Like Eyebrows
by Ryan Zubery BLOOMINGTON, MN — Having nothing else to do at 2:57 PM, Devon Tracy went to his bathroom and Read more
Girl’s Boyfriend Like, The Funniest Guy Ever
by Chai Karve USC -- We at the Sack of Troy have received word that local junior Jane Lazuli’s boyfriend Read more
Toes Slip Out From Bottom of Blankie
by Chai Karve MAZDA BROOK, NJ -- Late Thursday night, in a suburban home in northern New Jersey, 7 year Read more
Mom Only Person to Talk Shit to Daughter’s Face and Compliment Behind Back
by Sydney Sanchez LOS ANGELES, CA -- After overhearing her mother on the phone, college sophomore Eloise Van realized that Read more
Netflix Adds “& Chill” Section Featuring Several Hours of Background Noise
by Matt Hanisch LOS GATOS, CA — Based on feedback from numerous sources, Netflix has discovered that its viewers no Read more
Dakota Access Pipeline Finds Alt. Route Through Black Neighborhood
by Matt Hanisch LAKE OAHE, ND — After enduring several protests from members of the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe, developers Read more
Ralphs Fixes Typo, Adds Apostrophe
by Chai Karve COMPTON, CA -- At Ralphs Corporate Headquarters, panic is afoot. Top analysts in the company came to Read more