Bubba Gump Manager Thinks Today’s the Day Tom Hanks Finally Shows Up
by Joey Rayburn SANTA MONICA, CA – Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. restaurant manager Rickie Goad spent the early hours of Read more
Author: Staff
Coy Barista Indicates She “Totally Wants It” With Polite, Forced Smile
by Emily Halaka LOS ANGELES, CA – A typical morning coffee run got a little hotter this week when local barista Read more
Heartwarming! This Theater Student is Only In It For The Money
by Colin McIsaac LOS ANGELES, CA — It’s upsetting to think that collegiate arts programs are filled with students unafraid Read more
New Research Concludes Three Alt Rights Do Not Make An Alt Left
by Colin Mullins HARVARD, CONN. -- After less than a minute of analysis, researchers have concluded that three “alt-rights” do Read more
Area Man Fiscally Conservative But Socially Awkward
by Veronica Marks LOS ANGELES, CA -- In a time of deep political division, area man Chase Stuart defies the Read more
Empty Nesters Adjust To One Less Disappointment in House
by Kylie Charney-Harrington BELLEVUE, WA -- Sunlight streamed through the French doors of Cathy McCormick’s split-level as she padded through Read more
Professor in Midst of Mid-Life Crisis Offers Extra Credit to Anyone Willing to Go to Burning Man With Him
by Nolan Jones LOS ANGELES -- After realizing that he was probably past the halfway point of his insignificant life, Read more
USC Med Students Dissect Massive Elephant in the Room
by Ethan Thomson LOS ANGELES - USC’s Keck School of Medicine is off to an exciting start as students returned Read more
Woman with Pockets in Dress Incapable of Talking About Anything Else
By Kylie Charney-Harrington Hell-bent on demonstrating the utility of her stylish dress choice, local Laurel Hersey insisted on reminding every Read more
Girl on Apartment Meal Plan Finds Trojan Plan Sugar Daddy
by Elise Vondra TROJAN GROUNDS, USC – As she went to pay for her grande soy latte, sophomore Lucy White Read more