New Barstool Podcast Just a Live Goat, a Pair of Timberland Boots, and Bella Thorne

By Callahan Teceno 

New York City, NY – Earlier this month, media conglomerate/cult Barstool Sports, unveiled their newest podcast which just features a live goat, a pair of Timberland boots, and Bella Thorne. 

This idea was the brain child of rapper, influencer, and warlock Bella Thorne. The ‘Boo! A Madea Halloween’ star claimed she launched the podcast in order to give back to society in the most charitable way she knows, although there are no charity organizations of any sort connected with the project. “The world deserves a little twisted conversation full of dark magic and knives,” said Thorne. “I was in The Babysitter.” 

The show has already garnered the attention of thousands, racking up a cult following of listeners. “Oh yeah I’m a massive fan,” said New Yorker Allison Phish. “It was super tense when Bella and Timberland boots got in that fight, they had to use the goat as an intermediary for a few episodes.” 

Although the show has been met with huge success, it also has dealt with a few complaints. “Yeah I listen to it when I work out, but my main problem is Timberland boots,” said bodybuilder Jack Celly. “TBoots has talked so much shit in the past, I’m surprised they’re still on the show. I miss Brady.” This comment is not in reference to football star Tom Brady, but rather an actual football signed by Brady. The podcast originally was planned to feature the signed football, however it dropped out due to “scheduling conflicts.” 

The podcast will continue to produce daily episodes, with Barstool showing no signs of stopping its content train. ‘Tyson and Dyson,’ their newest series released just yesterday, which is just astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson and a Dyson vacuum cleaner, already has a billion downloads.