by Amanda Suarez
TROUSDALE PARKWAY — On a seemingly normal day, GreenPeace volunteer Scott Hunter had his entire world turned upside-down by student Michael Macaya when he stopped and asked a follow-up question about child-trafficking.
“This has never happened to me before. I was unprepared,” laments Hunter, a newly enlightened Buddhist-Christian and on-campus delegate for GreenPeace. “They don’t tell us how to respond. All I know how to do is ask people if they care about controversial topics.”
“I was genuinely interested in the topic, I guess,” commented Macaya, “He asked me if I hated child trafficking and, like, who doesn’t hate child trafficking? So I asked him where it’s the most prevalent and what local authorities are doing to combat it.”
Unfortunately for all afflicted children, Scott was caught off-guard by Macaya’s interest in what he was saying, and forgot all of his training.
Hunter said through tears, “I spend weeks standing on Trousdale hoping that no one actually asks me other questions about child trafficking. I don’t know! I panicked, okay!”
On campuses across the country, helpless GreenPeace volunteers fall victim to follow-up questions.
“It really was a shame,” Macaya said as he pretended to text while passing the Red Cross table. “I wanted to help, but I felt so bad when his face went blank. It was so sad to see. Very distressing.”
“We’re just supposed to make you feel bad, so you’ll donate,” complained Hunter. “You guys are the college students! Aren’t you supposed to know these things?”
Hunter has since been taken to a GreenPeace rehabilitation sanctuary and is projected to make a full recovery.