by Sasha Voth
USC–Jonathan Lee was certainly surprised when he was told that cigarettes are bad for you, and among other things increase your risk for cancer, stroke and heart disease. Lee, originally from Macau, China, had absolutely no idea that the smoke he was inhaling was slowly decreasing his life expectancy.
Good Samaritan Phoebe “Feelgood” White, a freshman, broke the news to Lee last Tuesday. This gallant crusader has made it her mission to save others from the perils of smoking. “Well I always make sure to cough really loud whenever I walk past someone smoking, and then last I week I actually posted something on Yik-Yak about smoking but I knew it wasn’t enough.” Eventually, Ms. White garnered the courage to confront a smoker: Lee.
“I was so nervous! But I just knew that he was uninformed of the dangers of smoking!” Lee, who was amazingly oblivious to what so many consider common knowledge, has vowed to quit.
Lee has since switched to E-Cigarettes, which of course are 100% healthy and safe.
“I just feel sick to my stomach, what else could I be doing that’s harmful to my health? I’m going to go back room and leech myself to get rid of all this bad blood.”