Lane Kiffin Leads Seahawks to Victory in Super Bowl Uproar

by Kevin Banifatemi

photo by zennie62

Just a few months ago it seemed that Lane Kiffin’s football coaching career was all but over, having been ousted as head coach at USC in the middle of a disappointing season.

Many recall the day that he was escorted off campus by DPS officers, reportedly exclaiming: “I’ll show you, I’ll show you all!”

“It felt like things could only go downhill from there” Kiffin recalled in a post-game interview. “After a couple weeks of self-pity I realized that something had to be done; I needed to be back in the game and I resolved to get rid of any obstacle and any person that got in my way.”

From there a series of unclear events led to a head coach vacancy with Seattle’s finest, which was subsequently filled by Kiffin. When asked about what exactly happened to the Seahawks’ previous coach Pete Carroll, Kiffin said only that “he’s unfortunately no longer with us,” and declined to comment any further.

Kiffin did in fact show them, show them all –leading the underdog Seahawks earlier today to a 43-8 victory over the Denver Broncos.

When asked by fans if he is simply following Carroll’s career around, moving to the Seahawks after coaching SC’s famous Trojans, Kiffin responded by putting his thumb on his nose and wiggling his fingers while exclaiming, “neener neener neener you can’t prove it!”

Onlookers report that Kiffin stuck his tongue out periodically during the response.