RA Seen on Date with Resident

by Jules Zucker

Above:  Photo by rockygirl05

USC students of all ages were taken aback this Thursday evening at the sight of a resident advisor eating a romantic candlelit dinner with one of her residents.

Junior spoonbending major Wendy Cougin, an RA in Marks Tower, chose the notoriously intimate EVK for her date with freshman Mark Moggins because of the “low-key atmosphere and free swipes.”

“I figured we could go relatively undetected at EVK,” said Cougin. “We got a few looks when I started spoon-feeding him my soft serve, but other than that I’d say it was pretty private.”

The pair met when Cougin was doing her nightly rounds as the RA on duty and found Moggins engaged in a quiet game of King’s Cup in his dorm with some friends.

“There was something so cute about the way she wrote me up,” said Moggins, an undeclared major. “I immediately asked her out.”

Though his floormates have expressed concern about his romantic relationship with an RA, Moggins is smitten, citing a particular fondness for her impressive lifestyle.

“There’s nothing sexier than a 21-year-old woman with a meal plan and a dorm. Her room even has a sink, that’s how you know she’s important.”

Despite Moggins’ feelings, however, his friends are less than thrilled about the relationship.

“It’s just so weird and inconvenient,” says freshman Daniel DeBrown, Moggins’ roommate. “Now I have to constantly hide my Natty lights because she’s always coming into the room.”

Before their EVK date, Moggins and Cougin had shared several flirtatious encounters, including thirty seconds spent silently in the elevator and a floor meeting called to remind residents to clear their hair out of the showers.

Both parties consider the EVK date a large step in the pair’s blossoming relationship: they shared a plate of EVK’s finest chicken fingers as a Daughtry song played softly in the background. Conversation topics included general education requirements, dining dollars, and other intimate and intellectually stimulating subjects.

“I really think it’s going well,” said Cougin. “Sometimes when I’m on duty, he calls me on the hall phone just to ask me how my day was.”

The pair intends to step things up a notch for their second date; they have dinner plans at Parkside next week.